by Ken Tuccio

Ones personal like/dislike for White Castle cheeseburgers strikes me as the ultimate example of personal taste.

I have friends who consider the White Castle burgers to be trash. They consider said burgers to be barely edible, and would rather starve than choke down a few. Then there’s me; I’m a huge fan of the burgers. I think they’re delicious, tasty, scrumptious, and various other adjectives that can be used to describe “good”.

As such, I always have these stocked in my freezer …

White Castle Microwaveable Cheeseburgers.

This is going to sound uber-cliché, but my love for White Castle cheeseburgers began after the first time I saw Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle.

Yes, I know that makes me sound like the ultimate studio pawn, but their marketing ploy got me interested in trying the tasty square cheeseburgers. It also got me interested in hanging out with Neil Patrick Harris, but he’s not as readily available in the freezer section.

Sadly, there’s no White Castle near me in Connecticut, and the closest one I know of is across the border in New York. The lack of White Castle restaurants in my area made my desire to try the burgers grow, so when I finally did sample a White Castle burger on a trip to New York, I was shocked that I actually really liked them.

I don’t know what it was about the White Castle cheeseburger that appealed to me. Maybe it was the way they eerily looked like the now defunct KFC Chicken Little, which I still say is the best chicken sandwich ever made, or maybe it was that I enjoy eating food that makes me feel like a giant. The bottom line is, White Castle cheeseburgers are so much different than the burgers of any other chain. They’re soft, they’re tasty, and they can be eaten in bulk by the bag.

I've found that if you try to down a bag of Whoppers while driving, you’ll vomit on the side of the road, but if you try and down a bag of White Castle cheeseburgers while manning a vehicle, you’ll at least be able to hold in your vomit until you get home.

Normally microwaveable versions of food pale in comparison to their fully cooked counterparts, so as such I was very skeptical when I first bought the White Castle Microwaveable Cheeseburgers. I thought that there was no way they could ever live up to the freshly steamed burgers I previously sampled at White Castle, but my love for the mini-microwaveable marvels grew with every step of the nuking process.

For example, I let out a cute “awwwww” when I first saw the way they were packaged …

The microwaveable burgers come in tiny little plastic wrapped two packs, which are more adorable than words can describe. If you gave me a choice between a new born puppy and these mini burgers wrapped in plastic, I’d have a tough time deciding which one I’d want to cuddle with more.

The plastic wrapped two packs make these burgers look like the kind of thing I’d throw in a backpack if I were ever in the need of packing supplies for a hike in the woods. I’m not sure they’d cook well over a fire, but they’d look cute and probably fit in my bag well, which is all I look for when packing hiking supplies.

That’s also why I don’t hike much.

As awesome as the cheeseburgers look while sitting in their frozen state, after a minute in the microwave they look even more mouthwatering …

There are not many microwaveable products that, after being nuked, look similar to the product you’d buy in a restaurant, but I’m always amazed that the nuked White Castle Cheeseburgers almost always look as good, if not better, than their store bought brethren.

What I love about microwaving these burgers is that they always fill my kitchen with the aroma of a fast food restaurant. I can smell the beef, smell the cheese, and if I had a few middle aged Mexican women running around screaming, “We need more ice.” in broken English, I’m fairly confident I would duplicate the environment to a tee.

The White Castle Microwaveable Cheeseburgers don’t just look awesome; they taste it as well. To further illustrate their awesome taste to the rest of the internet, I’ve snapped this picture …

As I said when I opened this article, your love for White Castle cheeseburgers is a prime example of personal taste, but as someone who loves them, I consider these tiny things delicious.

Seriously, these burgers melt in my mouth. They’re just as soft as their store bought counterparts, they’re just as cute as what you’d get in a restaurant, and they have almost the exact same taste.

The next time you’re in the freezer section and you pass by that little white box with those cute burgers on the front, be sure to pick it up and bring it home. Your freezer will appreciate it, and you’ll eat them without tiring, because I think it’s impossible to get tired of eating burgers that you can devour with one bite.